to grow is to be and to see

s a t i s f a c t i o n!
from action, -
a reaction?
a tricky thing, it is:
TO LIVE...
but
a d a p t a t i o n
IS KEY TO
s a t i s f a c t i o n!

---------------

I've come a long way, but I've got to keep moving (chuggin') along.
But growth is key, I find. A necessity.
[Self-reflection as well.]
Although, growth without reflection is: (impossible?)

Unsure I am
of what lies ahead.
BUT confidence will come,
the further from --
MISTAKES and (belly) ACHES

state of the (brain) address

it's (really) all about,

the M E N T A L zone you make in -

create in  - your mind.

earth-colored clay

I'm starting to get a clearer picture...
of what might be
the potential that could be

O P T I M I S T I C

I'm malleable
ever changing
never stopping
choo-choo!

tango til' their sore

H E A T -- 

it's making me,

turning me,

churning me,

in and out and up and down

C R A Z Y (!)

the weight at the end?

i f e e l a l l a r o u n d m e

pressing down on my back

tension, where is your release?

the END is in sight,

but out of reach

please, come quick!

save me. 

no way out but through.

UNFORTUNATELY

new hair for the new millennium

24 and counting

getting older
feels like...
s t r e t c h i n g
through
a
continuum of time

yesterday feels like
ages ago
but 1990 is
in my back pocket
clear as day

will it get any
e a s i e r ?
please, say yes.

full circle

i have made a
D E C I S I O N.

a
D E C I S I O N(!)
has been made

a decision
to return to
...
what was once
commonplace.
sometimes that is
the M O S T
simple, free(ing?)
ah yes:
l i b e r a t i n g.

---------------

let me try
red, pink, & white
i can feel [him]

it stares back
[at me]
waiting/watching

come
catch me
when I

f
a
l
l
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

on a path to fulfillment

giving things up is always hard to do -- but especially hard when you have compulsive/obsessive tendencies like me. what I'm realizing (more and more) however, is that the golden rule of "small but mighty" can be applied to more than just a games of chinese checkers. if you take it day by day, something that seemed impossible initially, will become inevitable with each passing day of success!

in the same vain as 'practice makes perfect' i think i am really starting to appreciate the rewards of self-discipline, focus, will and drive (something that I struggled with throughout college, i think). and this is not only in light of my recent lifestyle changes, but a general philosophy/principle that i want to start applying to all aspects of my day to day living.

in general, things seem to be going in my favor as of late and i want to keep it that way. in my eyes, the only way to maintain my current level of 'success' is to stay focused, be determined to continue on this path, and ultimately remain humble with each advancing step i make. other than that, it is out of my hands... i just need to stayed focused, and go along for the ride of a lifetime. be it up or down.

IN OTHER NEWS
alice comes to new york on monday! i'm really excited to host her for a month in new york (we finally finished renovating the equip. room and it's awesome, fo sheezy!) .... funny that i've been to switzerland so many times within the past ten years, and she hasn't been back to the states since that fateful night we hitch-hiked out of sea ranch, california (at age 15 and 13, respectively) on a mission to get some chocolate. those were the good old days, all right. carefree summer days, youthful optimism, and california sunshine -- who could ask for more?

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so here's to a new year and a new way of life -- still the same life, but with a different fire set underneath it. to meeting new people, attaining new prospects, and success with all that we so desire.